The Powerfully Profound Impact Of A Compliment

Many people go out of their way to purchase gifts or prepare grand gestures to express love, gratitude, and care, even to the point of stretching bills and budgets.

Such expressions are undoubtedly meaningful, but perhaps Yente said it best: “it doesn’t cost anything to be friendly.”

This Fiddler On The Roof line is commonly referenced as the inspiration for sayings such as “it doesn’t cost anything to be kind,” with both phrases here conveying not only the simplicity of kindness, but the unspoken value of a simple, spoken compliment.

“You are such a joy to work with.”

“Your smile always brightens my day.”

“I really appreciate you.”

“You really knocked that assignment out of the park - great job!”

“I miss you so much. Spending time with you is what I’m looking forward to most about this holiday season.”

What would it mean to you to hear any of the above listed compliments (or something similar)?

Have you ever received a compliment that completely turned your day around?

Have you ever given a compliment to someone, only to find that doing so brightened your day as well?

Compliments are a gift, and might I suggest that most of us do not realize how powerful such heartfelt expressions of kindness can be.

From improving self-esteem to boosting your mood, strengthening social bonds, decreasing stress, and more, compliments can have a powerful impact on both the giver and receiver of such kind-hearted statements.

So, today let’s take some time to explore the vast dividends of compliments, sentiments uttered from grateful and kind hearts, phrases that build-up and express gratitude, words which point out the beauty in each and every one of us.

What Happens When You Give A Compliment?

Prepare for impact…

We often think of this phrase in regard to an impending crash or explosion…something destructive.

But did you know these words technically only signify a call to prepare for something that can have a profound effect on the receiver?

That’s right, preparing for impact can be a good thing!

And, when you consider the power of a compliment, choosing to use your words to build others up, to express care and gratitude, or offer praise, the impact such sentiments can make on both the giver and receiver can indeed be profound!

Before we look at those profound impacts though, let’s cover a few basics.

Compliments address a number of things/areas, including:

Behavior - You can express praise, gratitude, and more for the way someone treats you, for a job well done, for a helping hand, etc.

Appearance - You can complement someone’s new haircut, eye color, smile, and more.

Ability - You can also offer compliments based on an individual’s unique talents like cooking, playing a sport or an instrument, singing, carpentry, etc.

Belongings/Things - Even compliments regarding someone’s clothing, vehicle, home, etc. can serve to convey care and kindness.

So, whether you’re speaking to a stranger, acquaintance, friend, family member, or colleague, a compliment should uplift and encourage, with the goal of communicating kindness and positivity to the hearer.

And, while we already described this practice as highly beneficial, those rewards aren’t just for folks on the receiving end of such expressions.

I suppose you could say, when you give a compliment, you actually become a recipient as well!

Of course, we don’t give compliments for the purpose of receiving benefits, but still, science has shown that those who regularly give kind compliments do benefit in the following ways…

1- Boosts Happiness

Research has proven that those who engage in doing random acts of kindness for others increase their own happiness in the process.

This is primarily due to the release of what many term as happy hormones, such as dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and others.

And believe it or not, random acts of kindness extend far beyond doing things and buying things for others.

In fact, giving a compliment is considered to be a free “random act of kindness.”

Of course, complimenting others is something you can do on a regular basis, but some studies have even shown that those who make a concentrated effort, on a specific day of the week for instance, to focus on such gestures, can benefit in even greater ways as the practice becomes more intentional.

So, if you find that expressing yourself verbally doesn't come easy, give this method a try as it may serve to make you more aware of such acts; then before you know it, giving (or gifting) compliments may become second nature.

2- Stress Relief And Potential Disease Prevention

We’ve already seen that giving compliments increases happiness, but this benefit then leads to others…

When you engage in activities which boost happiness and make you feel good, such as giving a compliment, your vagus nerve is positively impacted, and as your vagal tone increases, this has powerful benefits!

“High vagal tone helps your body regulate blood glucose levels and reduces the likelihood of diabetes and other diseases. It helps the body handle stress. It stimulates the heart and the GI tract to function optimally.”

I suppose this shouldn’t be too surprising though, as we’ve known for some time that emotions can be a great indicator of health, with positive emotions contributing to positive health outcomes.

3- Improves Social Connections

When you compliment others, you are essentially offering a means of connection.

Even when you give a compliment to a stranger, you are providing a means of interaction and connection.

But, when you compliment your neighbors, friends, coworkers, and family members, whether you realize it or not, you are strengthening the bond you already have with that person.

So, when you seek to kindly give compliments, you benefit by improving communication, strengthening relationships, and gaining a greater sense of connection with others.

(Of course, this is a mutual benefit.)

4- Grants Greater Gratitude

There are powerful benefits to daily gratitude, a practice whereby one seeks to look for (and intentionally list) several things they are grateful for each day.

Studies show that grateful individuals, specifically those who practice daily gratitude, enjoy less anxiety, fewer symptoms of depression, better heart health, improved sleep, and more.

And, a crucial part of giving compliments involves gratitude - noticing the strengths in others and expressing gratefulness for one’s abilities and efforts.

When you intentionally look for the good in others, giving attention to their strengths and positive attributes, this in turn can make you a more grateful person.

So, when you regularly give compliments, you’re training your brain to see the good things, the positive aspects of your family dynamic, work relationships, and the powerfully wonderful attributes of those in your circle (be it work, friendships, family, etc.).

Then, to amplify this benefit, consider the atmosphere you’re creating within your family, circle of friends, and work environment.

As gratitude and kindness increase, by genuinely seeking to give compliments, you are fostering a positive environment where teamwork, collaboration, and overall happiness can thrive…an environment where everyone (givers and receivers of compliments) benefits!

So, when you’re seeking to express kindness through a compliment, consider the following:

Authenticity

Have you ever received a compliment that you felt was fake, words uttered without meaning?

If so, then you know that words alone aren’t complimentary, or even kind.

What makes a true compliment so special, and impactful, is the fact that these phrases are genuine, authentic, and sincere.

People can sense when you’re sincere. And, people can sense when you’re not.

We all know that compliments consist of kind words and phrases, but if you’re speaking those words without meaning, without a genuine care for the hearer, then your expression will likely fall flat.

So, be authentic - even be vulnerable - and uplift others out of a heart of genuine kindness.

Gratefulness

As we’ve stated, some compliments stem from gratefulness, showing appreciation for others.

So, don’t forget to regularly, sincerely, compliment others for their actions, qualities, and efforts.

Think of one person right now who has made a positive difference in your life, even today.

Maybe you and your coworker finished a task recently - thank them for their insight, efforts, and hard work.

Perhaps the grocery clerk provided a pleasant, positive interaction - don’t take this for granted, instead express your appreciation for their cheer, kindness, and encouraging attitude.

Did your spouse bring you a cup of coffee this morning? Let them know how much you appreciate such small, meaningful, acts of kindness.

Be Specific

I feel like this goes hand in hand with being authentic, but sincere compliments are specific.

Generalities and vagueness don’t scream genuineness, does it?

However, when we’re specific in offering a compliment, in giving praise, or expressing gratitude, it lets the hearer know that you care enough to listen, be attentive, and notice the little things.

*****

Ah, and now it’s time for my favorite part…

We’ve been considering what a compliment is, how giving compliments can benefit our health, even some ways to effectively express the kindness intended behind a compliment, but we don’t give compliments just to receive.

No, when we truly put this kind of positivity out into the world, the best benefits surrounding these types of actions, in my opinion, are found in how such expressions can benefit others.

The benefits we’ve discussed thus far, those are simply extras, fringe benefits heaped back upon those seeking to simply impart a little sunshine into the lives of those around them.

But overall, and science confirms this, I don’t think we truly realize how much a sincere compliment can positively affect the person on the receiving end of this type of expression.

Benefits Of Receiving A Compliment

The entire reason we compliment others is to express praise or show gratitude, care, and kindness.

When we speak such words or phrases, we hope to brighten or improve someone else’s day.

But, as I’ve mentioned a few times already, compliments truly are a gift!

And, here’s a closer look at what this precious gift entails…

1- Boosts Self-Esteem And Self-Confidence

When you compliment others, you are giving them the gift of self-confidence as well as a boost in self-esteem.

A kind compliment regarding the beauty of someone’s smile, a compliment praising a job well done, or a few positive words shared even among friends can serve to make a significant difference in how that person perceives themselves.

Compliments can serve to validate the effort someone has put into a project.

And, compliments can serve to diminish any negative self-talk a person might be prone to engage in from time to time.

Essentially, whether you realize it or not, your gesture of kindness, through a sincere compliment, can go far beyond brightening someone's day, instead serving as a means to improve mental and emotional health in the lives of those on the receiving end of such expressions of care.

2- Promotes Positivity

Since we briefly touched on this above, I wanted to expound here:

Maybe you struggle with this, maybe not, but many folks battle with negative self-talk, being chronically critical of their actions, abilities, appearance, and more.

And, while this benefit extends to anyone on the receiving end of a compliment, for those battling their own internal negativity, being given a compliment serves to deconstruct this line of thinking.

When we acknowledge the work and efforts of others, when we take notice of the little things (like a haircut or a new sweater), complimenting on such acts or aspects prompts the hearer to equally take notice of these things.

If you receive a compliment based on your work performance, it encourages you to recognize your value and talent in this area.

Or, if you receive a compliment regarding your strengths, it forces you to acknowledge these strengths as well.

Overall, such comments can even make you more reflective, causing you to positively take inventory of your personal and mental well-being, which in turn can make you a more reflective, resilient, and positive person.

3- Improves Mood And Mind

A common reply to a compliment, other than “thank you,” often sounds a little something like this: “you just made my day.”

Why?

Because kind-hearted compliments do improve the mood of the receiver.

We covered how this is also a benefit for those giving compliments, but there’s no denying the reward for the receiver here.

When you receive a compliment, it stimulates the same areas of the brain associated with rewards.

And, upon hearing such kind sentiments, your brain releases dopamine, a hormone involved in mood, learning, and sleep.

So, immediately, this release serves to uplift your mood, increasing feelings of pleasure or happiness.

But, did you catch the other two rewards nestled in there?

This release of dopamine can also improve learning/memory and sleep.

Imagine the potential here!

If we all sought to be more attentive, better listeners, expressing care and showing genuine kindness to others, we could perhaps be giving the gift of knowledge/memory, better sleep, and happiness!

4- Strengthens Relationships

Receiving a compliment sounds like the easiest part of this equation, but it’s actually doing a great work within each of us.

When you allow yourself to receive a compliment, you are essentially opening up, permitting others to contribute to your happiness.

In doing so, this can combat loneliness, strengthen social bonds and relationships, and it even allows for an exchange of positivity, in the spoken and unspoken.

So, when you give a compliment, you’re also giving the gift of connection!

5- Pain And Stress Relief

Giving compliments can be equated with extending kindness, and some describe kindness as a chemical.

This is due to the effects both giving and receiving kindness has on the body.

You see, oxytocin is a hormone that plays a big role in our ability to connect with others, and a big part of connection centers around feelings of kindness, calm, and happiness.

When we’re on the receiving end of a complement, this kindness also prompts the release of oxytocin, and this induces an anti-stress response while also increasing one’s threshold for pain.

Each of these benefits also center around social connection, which we’ve already seen can be a benefit of receiving compliments, so when you give a compliment, beyond strengthening your connection with the hearer, you may also help to ease their stress and pain!

To each of you reading - I hope you have a blessed day, and I hope you know how amazing you are!

May we each seek to freely give and openly receive kindness in the form of compliments!

Check out Lifeboost Coffee Espresso.

References:

https://thedaily.case.edu/5-reasons-why-you-should-give-compliments/

https://prosper.psu.edu/the-power-of-compliments/#:

https://www.affiliatedmedicalgroup.com/Blog/the-power-of-compliments

https://www.verywellmind.com/positivity-boosting-compliments-1717559#

https://www.uclahealth.org/news/article/health-benefits-gratitude

https://getvipcare.com/blog/better-health-through-compliments/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evidence-based-living/202109/the-psychology-compliments-nice-word-goes-long-way

https://www.aruplab.com/files/resources/benefits/SupportLinc%20Supervisor%20Quarterly%20Newsletter%20-%20Spring2020.pdf

https://caringmedical.com/the-power-of-the-compliment/#

https://www.cedars-sinai.org/blog/science-of-kindness.html

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15834840/#